no but seriously... none was left behind.
oh hey, i got an idea! let's take the kid who passes out in heat and humidity to florida during an extreme heat wave where normal humidity levels are considered anywhere between 89 and 100%... good call hill. dumbass. in all honesty, this is the type of humidity that could make a steel character's hair in tomorrowland frizz.
so apparently, paper blogging is SO 2003, or something.
so here are some fun notes on disney vacation day 2: the magic kingdom (again.)
where have all the princesses gone? the hardcore ones anyway. sure it was 98 degrees and 87% humidity... but really? suck it up princesses. the characters, as in the fuzzy ones, were all up in our business. and don't even get me started on the princes. more importantly, where was princess tiana and the frog? frogs are common in florida i thought. aren't they into the whole "swamp" thing?
anyway, despite the utter lack of princesses and princes, the magic kingdom retained it's magical status: we followed the book and managed to get on all the great rides... minus "it's a small world" which really was a good thing, because the jingle gets stuck in your head and i'm fairly certain sends subliminal messages in an attempt to engender homicidal tendencies. this probably helps crowd control as well. you know, by killing off a number of tourists, locking up a number of other tourists for murder (mitigating circumstances of insanity, obviously), leaving the rest of us who were smart enough to avoid the sociology experiment to enjoy the magic kingdom. pretty good crowd control i think, actually.
wait a minute, figured out the lack of disney royalty: humidity + hair and makeup = sweaty frizzy unattractiveness. ok. vanity and royalty. makes sense. question as to where the princesses and princes were solved: in the disney spa getting pretty for a ball... somewhere.
incidentally, i found my previously drop-kicked biological clock while in line for "peter pan's flight" when a little girl said she wanted to ride it because she loved the story (literary inclined youth are cute.)
then overheard same child beg to have the princess makeover (which, incidentally, you can have done to your child for $200, no i am not making this up and yes they do become monsters as a result.)
... consequently drop-kicked biological clock... again.
taylor also thinks that literary inclined youth are cute.
ReplyDeleteit ALMOST makes you want to have one. but then you have to raise it... when they can talk and generally take care of themselves i'm good to go... it's just the part where they're helpless and i would absolutely be the overprotective mother... cause you know, of my health stuff. I WILL NOT ENABLE A CHILD! not sure how i got so lucky with my parents... but i don't think i'd be them...
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